There is wicked wind outside now. It's the same wind that ended a terrible couple of weeks for me. My toes were near frozen as I stood in line for a single ticket to see Ms. Fiona 'Guilty Eyes' Apple, Saturday night. I decided that if when the box office opened, they had a seat for me, that'd be the end of the energy I spent on anger and anguish. I really got battered around last week; it felt like a hard kick to the gut. I don't say this lightly, or for some kind of dramatic effect, but never had I considered taking my own life as plausible as I did late Wednesday. Even as I read it now, it sounds melodramatic, but it is true. If I recounted half of it, you'd understand. Unfortunately, it involves other people, and to them, I owe discretion. Just when my toes were on the verge of mutiny, a ticket was slipped under the box office window. (Ms. Apple, thank you for the huge smile on my face!) So, I'm letting it all wash over me. If you can help with a little understanding, and a smile when I wouldn't expect one, I will repay you twofold. I promise.
"In the midst of winter, I found there was within me, an invincible summer."- Albert Camus
*** I woke up Thanksgiving morning, threw on a pair of warm socks, and went to the supermarket with my little brother. Nutmeg, ginger, cinnamon, flour, pecans, pumpkin, and butter, make what? Spicy Pumpkin Pie with glazed pecans is what! I did it on a lark, as I really needed something to focus on. The results were surprising. It tasted yummy, at least to me. My family almost finished it at dinner, though it certainly could have been a courtesy to me. I managed to save a little slice, which I'm saving for when I finish a horrible, tragic research paper I've been assigned.*** I finally started compiling and rewriting the bunch of tidbits I've written for what I think will end up being a serial novel. I'm a better writer now, and I think it's time to give it a try. I'm gonna try to be three sections ahead of what I release, so it will be a few days before I post the first. I need somebody to just go over it with a fresh eye, so please volunteer in the comments section and I'll contact you. (I've asked a few people, but I think it better that it be done willingly. Those people, are, of course, more than welcome to volunteer below. Hint, hint.)Ja.